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Currently seeking therapy through literature. Wrote a novel once, Eccedentesiast (2013), and will proceed on writing casually. Don't take these writings seriously, don't let it question yourself.

Thursday, January 17, 2013

Personal Narrative Essay for English Lesson


The cloud layer was thin, widely spread amidst the atmosphere. Hiding beneath it was the moon, showing up too early, just by this afternoon. The sky wasn’t grey, wasn’t orange, wasn’t violet but a romantic mixture of soft magenta and a glimpse of light blue, as if it knows that the moon was a little bit blushing because of being premature. It has got the attention of all of the human beings that wander around, wondering why does it show up a bit earlier than it used to.  Supposedly, by this time of the day, the moon is awaken in the other side of the world, not yet here where I’m sitting now all alone in the terrace. I am also wondering the same thoughts as what the other human beings are listlessly doing so.

I too, seem to be awaken too early this afternoon. I should’ve still taking my nap by this time of the day. I used to wake up in the evening (out of tiredness of sleeping late), when the sky has turned dark and the moon has set itself free and took away the spotlight from the sun, along with her glittery friends –the stars. But then here I am, witnessing the absurd beauty of the evening sky, looking at everything in between absolutely… nothing. Somehow the sudden rushing voice of the pouring rain has caught my attention. Without any warnings, it fell down the roof of the earth to the grounds. The thunders have been sticking all over the sky as if Zeus was mad because he thought some guy flirted with his moon and made her blushed. The waters flowing down from the sky has washed away the trace of the guy that Zeus thought he was looking for.

Everybody left the moon alone; the glittering stars, the thin layers of clouds that have turned grey and the sun that was sailing away towards the horizon. Everybody was, afraid after they too, have seen what Zeus did after the mysterious guy made her blush. Now the spotlight is at her, the illuminating moon was all by herself amongst the dark grey sky. Like the moon, I too, was left all alone by my dad storming at the unknown guy who stole my heart for the first time. He was hunting down the guy who made me happy and in the same time broke my heart. My dad didn’t actually know anything about everything that was going on. The guy and I used to keep it a secret, we were pouring our loves invincibly.

This evening was very lonesome for me, and amidst all the wrath of the God in the sky, still all I hear is silence. I closed my eyes, trying to deny the memories that slowly come rushing in this empty heart through the pouring rain. Instead of forgetting what shan’t be reminisced, everything seemed to be clearer through time. The more I deny and the more I put some effort, the stronger it grows as if it feeds on these feelings of longing and wanting for something that I once had.

I remembered the day where we first walk down the bumpy road of love together. All the fights, the tears, the anger, the screaming and the yelling, in the end of the day ended up with the same happiness that we shared together. In the end of everything, we knew that we would still have each other no matter what happens. No matter who was wrong, who was right, what happened or how worse it got through time, we would make things up for each other. I didn’t cared too much about who won the argument over who, but really, all I’ve been caring about is you. The person who stood still under the deathly storms for this spoiled girl, which was… I. The person who brought me a dozen of red roses at a random night just to “see you smile”, you said. The person who always stayed under the blues, till the extent of me letting you go, stupidly without thinking about how things will drastically change.

So for now, I let my borders loose. I let myself travel in the past that exists in the back of my head that kept all the beautiful memories safely. I have been attempting to accept reality in this second of life, seeing that everything wont be the same anymore. But the sky has unlocked the key towards the box of memories and once it’s opened, everything just came bursting out of it, just like Pandora’s shell. I waltz my way to the past brave enough, thinking that I’ll find my path back to the state where I’m okay.

 Or at least I think I am.

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